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    1. 尋找一朵花

      推薦人:管理員 來源: 網友推薦 時間: 2015-06-28 08:39 閱讀:
        早晨散步的時候,突然看到一朵花,一朵遠離花叢的花,一朵不再站直的花。這朵花的枝躺在地上,躺在地上也不是直的,而是彎曲的。

        彎曲的,還不是一般的彎曲,它的彎曲,盡然在地上劃出一個圈,又在圈上延伸出來,向更遠的地方延伸而去,在更遠的地方,它竟然又抬起頭,開出一朵花來。

        見到這朵花的時候,我的心就為之一痛,又為之一震。痛是為了花枝的彎曲,究竟是什么樣的磨難,能讓一朵花的枝彎曲成這樣?它遭遇了什么?是自己長成這樣還是外來的力量迫使它這樣?震是為了它的花,就是這樣的一種磨難,它還是開花了,而且,是向上開出的花,是顏色鮮艷的花。這又是什么樣的一種力量讓它能戰勝一切的不幸而開出這樣鮮艷的花來呢?

        但我這一痛一震,卻也只是一個瞬間,我身前和我身后晨練人們的匆匆腳步聲,不停地走近我,又漸漸遠離我,遠離我,又漸漸走近我。我環顧著晨練的人們,一痛一震的感覺也就慢慢淡了、消失了。

        我本想用手機拍下這朵花的,但晨練人們的匆匆腳步聲讓我有些躊躇。我怕別人看向我的眼睛里,會因為我去拍這樣的一朵花而流露出異樣的光來。因而我有些膽怯起來,便悻悻地,一步一回頭地離開了這朵花。

        我離開了這朵花,但這朵花卻沒有離開我!這朵花就像一粒種子,深深地在我心中扎下根來。不論我走向何處,不論我看什么樣的風景,我的腦海里總是會出現這朵花,我的心中也總會因這朵花而痛著、而震著。于是,我掉轉回頭,向著我看到這朵花的地方急奔而去。

        但是,我卻再也找不到這朵花了。在我見到這朵花的地方,殘存著園丁們從花叢里薅下的一些雜草和一些花朵,這些花朵中,有的快要枯萎了,有的卻還鮮艷著。我的心不覺一涼,也更加痛起來。

        這些薅下的雜草與花朵中會有那朵我尋找的花嗎?我不知道,我只知道,讓我痛、讓我震的那朵花不見了,消失在了我離開它的短短的一段時間里。

        它為什么要消失啊,我為什么那個時候不拍下它呢?我怕什么呢?別人都在匆匆地走著、鍛煉著,我拍一朵花又有什么不妥呢?

        許多事啊,都是事后才知道后悔的。

        突然想起曾經看過的一篇文章來,大意是有人很想到一個地方去看望一個對自己有恩的人,但因種種原因,直到那個恩人去了,他才匆匆趕過去,卻再也見不到活著的他了。悲痛悔恨愧疚中,他深深自責。難道自己真的就那樣忙嗎?就真的抽不出去看望恩人的時間嗎?可他的自責卻永遠只能是自責了,一切都晚了……

        那個沒看到恩人的悔恨與愧疚,應該就是我現在的心境了吧。假如見到這朵時我果斷地拍下它,又有誰會去笑話我、用異樣的目光去看我?就是別人笑話我、用異樣的目光看我,那又怎么樣呢?會讓我像現在這樣后悔懊惱嗎?而現在,當別人看到我這樣一個失魂落魄般的人站在一片雜草前,別人的目光是不是也會有異樣?那又能怎么樣呢!

        人啊,真的說不清楚,很多重要的選擇,其實也就是一瞬間的事兒。

        花兒,真的對不起了!我看著眼前的雜草和花朵在心中默念著。

        其實我自己清楚,真正對不起的,不只是花兒,還有我的心。

        作者:張克社

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